On Self Love

Everyone treats the new year as the time to start off fresh, though you know, we can start anything over or a completely fresh start at any time we want. Silly humans.

Many of us choose to work on a flaw we have this time of year, usually about our personal image; quitting smoking, & losing weight are two common ones. Why don’t we take a step back further and why not try loving ourselves more?

I believe a lot of our vices we have come from insecurity, and if we can change how we feel about ourselves, dropping these vices should be a lot easier, hypothetically speaking, no? With some self-love comes confidence and the ability to say no to your co-workers that you don’t need to go for a smoke, or saying no to an ex boyfriend who may make you feel good for a week, but lets be honest, its all down hill after that sister, been there. With self-love we can say no thanks pal, because we know what we deserve, we give a shit about ourselves.

“But how can self-love relate to my resolution of losing weight? You’re out to lunch Cass.” Well, we create our life each and every day with how we talk to ourselves and with our thoughts. Whether for you thats talking to God or putting good energy out there, it ends up being the same.  If you are constantly thinking, “I’m a fatty, I’ll never look like her eat another cupcake why don’t you.” Well then thats just whats going to happen cause that’s what you’re putting out there. If you could change that around and think, “I love my body, I’m going to do whatever it takes for me to feel my best cause I deserve to,” it’s a positive thought, it doesn’t sound as much of a chore and the Universe/God is going to bring you positive ’cause that’s what you’re putting out there/the message you’re sending and what you’re asking for.

Not paying any mind to what people think of you. So many women I chat with often worry about what others are saying about them, all through out the year. It has bothered me as well. But, “what others say of you is a reflection of how they feel about themselves, their own reality. When you are immune to the actions and opinions of others, you are no longer the victim of needless suffering.” Damn, that Don Miguel Ruiz knows whats up. Read his book The Four Agreements, and you’ll know what I’m talking about. If you buy one book this year, buy this one. Its short and can help change the way you see everything, in a great way.

I have started to notice more often how many blessings in disguise show up in my life. I used to fret if something did not work out for me; a missed opportunity, a love that didn’t pan out, but not long after I would see how said situation went, and thanked my lucky stars I wasn’t involved. Remember how heart broke you were the first time you got dumped, and thought you’d never love again? You probably worried about why he dumped you, which created some kind of complex on yourself, which you have probably carried with you since then… Hopefully you learned from each relationship since then the things you want in someone, and the kind of love you deserve. Have you figured out yet that if you have a shitty relationship with yourself, it’s likely to show up in the relationships you have?

What are some Self-Love practices you can do right meow?

  • Find some positive affirmations that you can repeat daily to yourself. Write them on sticky notes and post them on your bathroom mirror.
  • Set some boundaries with yourself and with others
  • Put yourself first. 
  • Get your butt to a gym or go do some form of exercise. I have to convince myself to go most days, but I am always thankful I did!
  • Unfollow all accounts on social media that make you feel small or inferior. Why do you choose to feel that way? Unfollow right meow!
  • Cut out people who aren’t serving any purpose in your life. Do they make you feel shitty? Why the HELL are they your friends?


Slowly but surely I am getting this Self-Love thing figured out. Certainly is taking a while, but there’s progress! Onwards and upwards!

How do you practice self love, and do you notice a difference in your life when you’re more kind to yourself?


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